Living with Someone Affected by Dementia – Conversations to Remember

One of the most important steps to take when working out how to live with a person who has dementia is making an effort to understand what dementia is. Dementia describes a group of symptoms, including a loss of problem-solving abilities and memory, as well as changes in emotions, mood, and behavior. Some individuals may experience challenges such as disorientation or impaired judgement. Over time, these symptoms will worsen, leading to a higher dependency on caregivers and/or family members. It is important that whoever is caring for the individual with dementia is able to adapt to their needs and offer support with daily tasks. In many cases, this responsibility falls on whoever is living with the person who has dementia. As important as it is to be there for the individual living with dementia and to maintain a stable and comfortable environment, it is also essential for the caregiver to practice self-care and prioritize their own emotional health.

Communication

Communication is a crucial skill when living with someone who has dementia. As an individual’s cognitive abilities decline, it can be difficult for them to express their thoughts or to understand what others are saying, which could lead to frustration for both parties. Therefore, it is important for someone living with a person who has dementia to use certain techniques for effective communication.

Be patient: Give the individual living with dementia time to process information, and try to maintain eye contact to show you are present and engaged.
Use simple language: Speak in clear, short sentences rather than complex constructions. This can help an individual with dementia better comprehend what they’re being told. It can also be helpful to use familiar language and repeat sentences if necessary.
Avoid confrontation/arguments: If a person living with dementia says something that is inaccurate or does not make sense, consider whether correcting them will benefit them. If it is inconsequential, and will only irritate them, it may be beneficial to ignore the error, and either move on with the conversation or pivot to a new topic.
Use visual/nonverbal cues: Use your body language and facial expressions to assist in conveying your message. Non-verbal cues like these can be helpful, since verbal communication can be difficult for individuals with dementia to understand at times. Visual cues, such as pictures or written reminders, can also help reinforce communication.

Caregiving Tips

Caregiving is a huge responsibility and requires a major commitment to be successful in providing comprehensive support to an individual living with dementia. It is a responsibility that requires organization and flexibility, which can, at times, be overwhelming.

Be aware of emotional needs: Someone living with dementia may experience depression, frustration, and anxiety because of their cognitive decline. Providing unconditional emotional support can help improve emotional wellbeing.
Promote physical activity: Physical activity, as long as it is safe and appropriate for the individual’s abilities, has both physical and mental benefits. Individuals should be encouraged to engage in activities suitable for their physical state, whether that be walking outside or simply stretching in a chair.
Establish daily routines: A structured routine can reduce confusion and may help individuals living with dementia feel more secure. This can include consistent bedtime routines, meal times, and activities.
Monitor physical health: Monitoring an individual living with dementia’s general health is important, since they are at higher risk of physical health issues. Further, they may lose some abilities to recognize when they are in pain or when they are not feeling ‘normal’.
Medication monitoring: A person living with dementia may lose their ability to track whether they’ve taken their medications, so that must be carefully monitored by the caregiver. It is important to not that some medications have different and dangerous impacts on seniors that they did not have on the same individuals when they were younger.
Balancing the need for independence: As their dementia progresses, daily activities will become increasingly difficult for an individual to do on their own. If you are living with a person who has dementia and requires assistance with daily tasks, it is important to only step in as needed. It is also important to recognize that an individual’s abilities to complete certain tasks may change on a daily basis.

Common Caregiving Mistakes

No matter how much research a person does or how hard they try to determine the best way to provide care for a person living with dementia, missteps are inevitable. Nobody is perfect, and it can be difficult to always do the “right” thing at the right time. It is important to be patient and understand that there will be good and bad days. However, there are some mistakes caregivers should be aware of in order to best avoid them.

Shaming: Individuals living with dementia cannot control what is happening to them or their symptoms. Consequently, shaming someone who cannot change their behavior is an inappropriate and counterproductive tactic.
Arguing: It is important to take a step back and learn to see the world through the view of a person living with dementia rather than trying to argue with them, even if you strongly believe that you are in the right. Arguing with a person who has dementia can make them feel frustrated and distressed.
Treating an individual with dementia like a child: Infantilizing an individual living with dementia be perceived as speaking down to them, which could be frustrating and degrading for them.
Using medication to control difficult behaviors: Try to understand what triggered the difficult behaviors before resorting to medication. Often, these challenging behaviors can be effectively resolved by identifying and addressing their underlying causes.
Doing everything for them: Working with an individual living with dementia and providing them with as much autonomy as possible can be extremely beneficial for their wellbeing. Try to find a balance between safety and preserving the individual’s choice and dignity.

Living with a person affected by dementia presents unique challenges but also offers opportunities to build deeper connections and demonstrate empathy. By focusing on understanding the condition, prioritizing effective communication, and practicing thoughtful caregiving, it is possible to create a supportive environment that benefits both the individual with dementia and their caregiver. Remember, caregiving is a journey that requires patience, adaptability, and self-compassion. Embracing these principles not only improves the quality of life for the person with dementia but also ensures the caregiver’s well-being. By working to balance the needs of both parties, you can navigate the complexities of dementia care with resilience and kindness.

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